The Blend Trend

I don’t like to say negative things about beer. I know I’ve already taken more than my fair share of shots at the bigger corporate breweries but I really do try to focus on the positive aspects of beer. There are too many great beers out there to waste time lamenting the travesties of Chelada style beers or Leinenkugel’s Summer Shandy.

But it must be done. Leinenkugel’s makes some really good beer, not necessarily great but definitely better than average. There are exceptions that you might want to avoid. Leinie’s Berry Weiss and Honey Weiss beers are just a bit too sweet for my taste. I’m not opposed to fruit being mixed in the brewing process but when flavors are added after the fact it gets risky. The problem with these two beers is the fact that they aren’t bitter enough from the start to offset the sweetness. Columbus Brewing Company offers an Ohio Honey Wheat that pulls it off but that’s the exception rather than the rule. Wheat beers generally get so much sweetness from the malt that adding a sugar after the fact can push them over the edge. At least for me.

The thing is, even though I’m not crazy about the sweet wheats, I can drink them and once I convince myself that I’m not drinking beer I can enjoy them in the same manner a person enjoys White Castles. You’ll never confuse a slider with haute cuisine but that doesn’t mean you can’t gulp down a sack of ten from time to time. Berry Weis is like that.

The major offense in the Leinie family is Summer Shandy. This is a blend of lemonade and beer. Apparently this is popular in Europe but then again so is Coldplay. ZING. This beverage starts of with a whole lot of lemon, develops on odd beer-like flavor in the middle and finishes with the strange flavor of meat. That’s right, I said meat. Every time I’ve tried this shandy I swear I ended up with a taste in my mouth very similar to the taste I get after eating a sausage. This is not a good thing when you’re drinking beer.

I don’t think you’ll get the same sensation. I’m pretty sure I just lack the frame of reference to classify the aftertaste but whatever I’m left with is unpleasant. I don’t really care for the mingling of lemonade and beer in the first place but when I’m squinting into the bottle wondering if there is a half-chewed hunk of kielbasa floating around in there it’s just awful. Awful. And I feel comfortable saying so because the minute you pour lemonade into beer you no longer have either.

Cheladas are Mexican-inspired beverages that blend tomato juice and beer. What you have to understand about these drinks is that Mexico is home to a lot of really crappy beer. Corona is popular in the US but only because that beer is marketed so aggressively. In reality it’s not a whole lot better than Budweiser. If you have a lime shoved in your bottle that lime goes a long way to mask how uninspired Corona really is. There are a few good Mexican Beers, such as Negra Modelo and Dos Equis but the majority of Mexican beer is pretty lousy.

So Mexicans play with their lousy beer by mixing things into it. One of those concoctions is Chelada. Basically that’s a beer with Bloody Mary mix in it and because of the growing Hispanic market, AB has started bottling Budweiser with tomato juice cocktail right at the brewery thus watering both of them down. Yummo. These beers have a niche in the Southwest and the reach is expanding in other markets because of the monkey see principal but that doesn’t mean these products are good.

I’ve tried a Chelada and all I can say is that it didn’t taste like meat. I also didn’t taste like beer or tomato juice. I’d say it was a little bit like drinking that pink water that pools on the top of the ketchup after the contents of the bottle start to separate.

Now I’m not going to get on a high horse and say that beer shouldn’t be mixed with anything but when you think about the artistry and craftsmanship that goes into a really good beer…a craft beer…why would you do anything to diminish the final product? You can if you want but you should be very judicious in what you go throwing into your beer. I spend too much money on my beers to be fiddling around with them.

There are exceptions. A number of stouts, particularly chocolate and coffee stouts, go great with ice cream. If you haven’t tried a stout float, buy a bottle of Young’s Double Chocolate Stout and spill a few ounces over a scoop of high quality vanilla bean. It’s outstanding. Lambics also pair well with ice cream and sorbet. Bell’s Java Stout is another good float medium.

Another great idea is to blend beers. Collaboration not Litigation Ale is an example of a beer that was born by mixing two together and Ommegang’s Three Philosophers is a Belgian style ale that is blended with a bit of lambic. Of course we've all had a black and tan. Imagine if you replaced the overrated Guinness and Bass with a smokey imperial stout and a dry-hopped American pale ale.

I even had a Bloody Mary that featured a splash of Guinness but I’m pretty sure that the Guinness had little influence on the final result. There was so much horseradish, Tobasco and lime in that mix a pint of Guiness would have struggled to make its presence known.

Again there are no rules. Beer is about making people happy. If you want to spend $10 on a four pack of Nosferatu and mix it with Diet Sprite, go for it.